Two Years Ago
Two years ago today the entire floor of nurses and doctors placed bets on your sex. Most of them lost.
Two years ago today I sat stunned as they were unable to find your heartbeat with the doppler and put an internal monitor on your head. A place that still bears the scar of this pre-birth trauma.
Two years ago today your father was knocked down in the hospital hallway by the anesthesiologist who was running to my room when I couldn't breathe and your heartrate was plummeting with each contraction.
Two years ago today, in an event I wish I could block from my memory, a doctor reached his hand up inside of me to manually turn you when you were stuck.
Two years ago today I heard the words "it's a girl" and discovered that the tiny hats came in pink
Two years ago today was the last time I talked to my beloved sister in law when I told her about your birth and she cried. I told her you'd be waiting to meet her after she recovered from her bone marrow transplant, but that never happened.
Two years ago today I kept checking your diaper in disbelief.
Two years ago today we named you a "boy" name because we didn't have a "girl" name picked out. And it suits you perfectly.
Two years ago today I made up a silly little song that I still sing to you today, and will continue to sing to you even when you are a mortified teenager.
She's a pretty little girl
The prettiest in the world
My teeny tiny little girl
She's my tiny little treasure
Worth more than I can measure
Oh how I love my baby girl.*
Happy Birthday! I love you.
(* After singing the song for a few months, my feminist side began to feel guilty that I was only singing about how pretty and small she was. So, I have since added other verses that talk about how smart, clever, and strong she is. But these were the original words, for better or worse.)
Two years ago today I sat stunned as they were unable to find your heartbeat with the doppler and put an internal monitor on your head. A place that still bears the scar of this pre-birth trauma.
Two years ago today your father was knocked down in the hospital hallway by the anesthesiologist who was running to my room when I couldn't breathe and your heartrate was plummeting with each contraction.
Two years ago today, in an event I wish I could block from my memory, a doctor reached his hand up inside of me to manually turn you when you were stuck.
Two years ago today I heard the words "it's a girl" and discovered that the tiny hats came in pink
Two years ago today was the last time I talked to my beloved sister in law when I told her about your birth and she cried. I told her you'd be waiting to meet her after she recovered from her bone marrow transplant, but that never happened.
Two years ago today I kept checking your diaper in disbelief.
Two years ago today we named you a "boy" name because we didn't have a "girl" name picked out. And it suits you perfectly.
Two years ago today I made up a silly little song that I still sing to you today, and will continue to sing to you even when you are a mortified teenager.
She's a pretty little girl
The prettiest in the world
My teeny tiny little girl
She's my tiny little treasure
Worth more than I can measure
Oh how I love my baby girl.*
Happy Birthday! I love you.
(* After singing the song for a few months, my feminist side began to feel guilty that I was only singing about how pretty and small she was. So, I have since added other verses that talk about how smart, clever, and strong she is. But these were the original words, for better or worse.)
9 Comments:
I somehow stumbled onto your blog and have read all the way through it. I must say you are an incredible women. I only have 2 girls that are almost grown and sometimes want to ripe my hair out. I always dreamed of having a large family and it just didn't happen that way. I have sat here and read all of your site and never have laughed so hard on your postings. You are great. You really should look into being an author. I look forward to reading your future postings.
I love this post. Your little girl. She is a doll. Sounds so trumatic. Looks like she was worth it though. Glad you are both okay and enjoying each other.
I know what it's like to cry over a pregnancy, and then to be overwhelmed with awe of the little life that lights up everything she touches.
It's good to celebrate, to remember.
A very happy two-day to both girly and mommy. Make it the best.
Happy birthday sweet girl! You're growing up very well.
And gosh, your little brother is growing up fast too!
Someday soon we'll have to get together so you can see what a family of girls is like. :)
I hope your two year old had a good birthday. She sure is beautiful with her little brother next to her.
That is too sweet! What a darling cuties you've got there. I've a two year old son so life is good.
I called my oldest daughter "Thomas" for the eight months she was in utero (pre-eclampsia brought her into the world 4 weeks early), and spent the first hour of her life just repeating, "it's a GIRL" over and over again....I guess that's why she still prefers the color blue to pink!!
Happy Belated Birthday L! I'm still hoping to get to meet you before you attend college! Make your mommy come camping my way again!
Boy time does fly Chris! Make them stop growing!!!! PLEASE!!!!!
what a beautiful tribute to your daughter and to your strength as a mother.
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