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Friday, August 05, 2005

Just When I Think I Have Nothing To Write About

This morning a big truck backed into our driveway to deliver sheetrock. The beep beep beep sound that the truck made backing up brought the children scurrying from all corners of the house, acting like they are shut ins who have never had contact with the outside world.

As they surrounded the two men I noticed that one of the men was missing his leg. He had a metal leg in it's place. I cringed inside because I knew this would not escape the notice of my children and one of them would say something embarrassing. Though I don't know why it should be embarrassing, he knows he is missing a leg. But I guess it has been so drilled into me as a child that you don't stare and you pretend not to notice anything different about anyone. Wouldn't it be much more refreshing to say something like, "Hey, cool leg!" or "Do you wear a sock on the foot of your metal leg so that it matches your other leg?"

As they were carrying the load of sheetrock into the house, my 4 year old turns to me and says, "Do you think he is a pirate?"

I quickly said, "Shhhhh. He isn't a pirate. Now, shush."

"But, how do you know?"

I said the first thing that came to my mind, and I knew would shut him up, "He isn't wearing an eye patch, that's how." I whispered.

Good Lord, what's wrong with me.


Blogger Jen said...

Lol, thanks for the laugh!

12:01 PM  
Anonymous Frazier said...

I love that! Did he have a parrot on his shoulder?

12:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


The things you come up with!! You could have said, "well, he came here on a truck, not a ship!"

12:18 PM  
Blogger Meg said...

Brilliant! I would've been inclined to tell my kid he WAS a pirate. But I see how that might not've worked out.

1:58 PM  
Blogger Sarah said...

Oh, too funny!

2:09 PM  
Blogger buffi said...

Oh, now see, I think that was the perfect explanation for a 4 year old. It satisfied him didn't it?

3:07 PM  
Blogger Julie said...

There's nothing wrong with you. It's like me telling my daughter that the guy grilling outside his apartment without a shirt is not Spiderman, because Spiderman's chest isn't be THAT hairy.

4:10 PM  
Blogger MamaGeph said...

It is always best to make sure he doesn't use the words "matey" or "Ar!" before assuming someone is not a pirate. You so do NOT want to be sued by the PLA (Pirate League of America) for workplace harassment.

4:50 PM  
Blogger Effortlessly Average said...

How funny. Reminds me of a time I was shopping with my daughter when a man dressed in cowboy attire walked down the isle toward us. He stopped to look for something on the shelf about ten feet or so away. My daughter looked at hif for a minute, with his big black hat, dirty boots, and Wranglers then said: "look Dad, a howdy man!"

4:50 PM  
Blogger Sylvana said...

That was an excellent answer! I couldn't have thought of a better one.

9:37 PM  
Anonymous Jason Berggren said...

Arrrr! That's a wee bit nasty for a land-lubber...

10:24 PM  
Blogger Toni said...

Great brainstorming, Mom!

Props to the dude for still doing manual labor after losing the leg, too.

11:36 AM  
Blogger DollyMama said...

At least they didn't pop out from around the corner with a plastic sword yelling, "Ahoy, matey!"

12:56 PM  
Blogger Michelle said...

I read but have never commented before... thank you for the giggle, it reminds me of my house and something my kids would and have said in the past! :)

12:37 AM  
Blogger Barb, sfo said...

That was perfect! You did a wonderful job of meeting your child right where he is.

6:03 PM  
Anonymous Amy Byram said...

Chris, That was perfect! I am sure though, dealing with the public that man is used to dealing with comments. My husband was in a motorcycle accident years ago and is a below the knee amputee and wears a prostetic leg. Our kids love it! They thinks its the best thing to have a dad with a "robot leg". LOL!

We also keep a "spare leg", which was an old one he had (for spare parts) no joke! We keep this leg in our closet. One day our youngest son, Logan, pulled it out and was sitting on the floor with it. I asked him, "What are you doing"? He said, "Tickeling daddys foot"!! :)

2:12 PM  

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