And the week has only just begun

Mistakes I have made this week:



1) Buying my daughter a ridiculously priced pair of linen Ralph Lauren capri pants... in white. Yes, white. I was blinded by their cuteness, and perhaps their whiteness, and was unable to think rationally while in that state. That is the only explanation I have.

2) Buying this daughter a Reese peanut butter cup and allowing her to eat it in the warm car on the way home from the store, while she is wearing those cute white capri pants.

3) Allowing my toddler to play with my cell phone, because what could he possibly do to it?

4) Cleaning the sticky cell phone off by soaping it up and rinsing it off under the running water

5) Upon discovering that the vibrating feature on the phone will not turn off no matter what buttons are pressed, repeatedly smacking it on the counter

6) Planting some adorable little flowering plants in front of the house without reading the name of the plant, because who really cares what the plant is called.

7) Discovering that the adorable plant is catnip and all the neighborhood cats are now in the yard eating it and rolling around on the lawn like they are stoned. There are only so many jokes one can make about having the neighborhood stoner house before it gets old and not funny and makes one wish they had a gun and accurate aim.

Learn from me, people.